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By Pamela V Hall
It is getting more common these days for some children to take the decision to divorce their parents. There has always been the problem of family breakdown occurring for generations but never as prevalent as it is today considering the shocking statistics in the UK that by the age of sixteen half of the children will see their parents separate. Some parents have not bothered to get married as they have found it financially more beneficial to remain single parents. This corruption of family life has been happening insidiously over a long period of time due to irresponsible government in the UK
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1336318/Half-children-parents-split-reach-age-16.html
This has certainly not helped with regard to children's emotional health and welfare and is one of the reasons children now adult cares less about caring for their aging parents. The fact that times have changed and both parents are likely to be working as well as bringing up children of their own they have little time left for caring about or for their own parents. Another reason is the judgemental attitude that some children now adult have taken towards their parents for the past mistakes and bad decisions they made in the past. Let us not pretend that over the last three generations we could not have made a better job as a society or we would not be in the position we are today. What is causing concern now is the number of adult children who are making the decision to divorce their parents completely. This could be for many different reasons as each family is individual and very personal. If any adult is thinking of taking this huge step it is important to consider the effect this will have on themselves and their children in the future as well as on their own parents now facing a much shorter lifetime and most likely with serious health problems.
Why should adult children care if their own parents have not provided them with their needs? there will always be some parents who did not care for their children, those who are not sorry and will deliberately not change, but not all, there are those whose circumstances prevented them maybe for a good reason, and some who in spite of the saying a leopard never changes it's spots can and do change even if it is late in life, isn't that when forgiveness should be given, we are all human and vulnerable to mistakes and fate can deal blows to all of us however comfortable we may be, when judging a parent before divorcing them look ahead, it is easy to say when judging that I would never do that, or I would never let that happen. It takes time to heal and sometimes a very long time, isn't it better to keep the door open no one knows what the future holds, unforeseen things can happen to anyone, by divorcing parents entirely what example are these adult children giving to their own children, perhaps they should wonder that because of their example the same thing could happen to them and their children easily choose to divorce them. What does it cost to have patience and to agree to disagree, even if it is necessary to keep a distance for the sake of young children. The door can still be left open. Having compassion and being less judgemental heals a lot of wounds, and if we have really done our best there is nothing to reproach ourselves with and there is no failure, at least be thankful when looking in the mirror and at the children and grandchildren that if it were not for the parents none would be alive at all. It serves no purpose to blame anyone for who we are because we choose to make of ourselves who we are.
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